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The
DREAM METHOD is about realising your potential as a person and
as a sexual being both physically and psychologically. This
really is a new method that has worked with hundreds of my
clients and contains new ways to think and feel about your sex
life. It is a method for improving your whole relationship
based on Nobel prise winning science and many years experience
working with people in long term relationships who want to
love more deeply.
Discuss
Talk with your partner about your sex life. Be positive, its OK to
feel somewhat embarrassed but those feelings reduce if you
keep trying. Laugh if you are embarrassed – I still get
embarrassed after 20 years talking about sex professionally!
Start with the things you like about your partner and what they do – the little things like making a special
dinner – or the way they kiss you. Tell them what you need
and show them. Men and women communicate all the time
nonverbally and don’t allow the time for a really erotic
experience that they fully engage in.
The most important aspect of sex for Australian men and women, the
research shows, is satisfying your partner.
But do you really know what your partner likes about
you and what you do? Or vice versa?
Relax
Everyone knows to have good sex you should relax. But I advise
different. I say sex needs the right amount of relaxing due to
the psychological and physical conditions.
The physical conditions are the environment like a comfortable
place to set the mood. The psychological conditions are
something again.
Relaxing
and having sex are a contradiction because sex is so exciting.
If you relax too much you are likely to go to sleep! If you
don’t relax enough you will feel anxiety not excitement. So
the first thing to learn is the middle path between relaxed
and excited that suits you. This is the great cure for sexual
boredom that so many complain of. Most think that by doing
more things you will cure the boredom – not true. The
boredom comes from not really experiencing the feelings
underlying anxiety. Anxiety is not really a feeling
- its just trying to control a feeling! For many really
exploring their feelings of love and sex are scary so they
back off or try and get the sex over with quickly.
Emotion
Once
you have found the path between anxiety and boredom you can
allow yourself to really experience the emotions of sex and
love. The feeling of being open to another person is one of
the deepest human connections and experiencing that
acceptance, care and closeness is a life long journey of
knowing yourself and your partner. To really feel your
eroticism is a challenge and yet most people only take little
glances during sex at their partner to see the effect they are
having. Open your eyes during lovemaking and enjoy the
feelings that both of you are experiencing and sharing!
Attitude
Sex
should always be consenting, safe and between adults.
Many
people have a bad attitude about sex. The right attitude is a
mix of integrity, empathy and negotiation. The attitude
involves giving of yourself, not demanding of the other and
maintaining your integrity. You need to understand how your
partner feels and then you can negotiate about what you would
do and not do. The trick to negotiation is to acknowledge the
others limits and to help them grow as an individual. So it
changes from “you wont do oral sex” to
“I understand that you are worried what others are going to
think if you do oral sex
but I don’t want that to interfere with our intimacy
and fun together”. Then respect their decision – you still
may not get the oral sex you want but you have a much better
chance.
Massage
Sex
starts in the brain – and foreplay begins a long time before
you undress. Foreplay is when you start making the moves –
those unsaid, almost secret little signs that each couple
knows to communicate their interest.
And
now when you start touching there is something new you can do
– together if you like! You can place a small amount of
Dream Cream on your finger and massage on to your clitoris and
vagina. Some women get better results after two or more
applications and the amount you apply depends on your
requirements. Dream Cream is water based and therefore
harmless to synthetic or rubber materials or if swallowed.
Dream Cream is not a medical or lubricant product, it is a
cosmetic. It is not intended to diagnose, treat or cure any
medical condition or disorder. It is a fun lifestyle product
for women.
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The
Dream Method